Thank you. Thank you to everyone who has been praying for our family, who have come to visit us and keep us company at the hospital, who have sent us cookies and gifts and cleaning ladies and blankets and meals, who have listened to us cry, who have encouraged us at low points, who keep calling even when we don't always call back, and who have surrounded us with your love and generosity. There is no real way to say thank you that adequately expresses our sincere gratitude for how loved we feel. But, we are so grateful and couldn't be getting through this without each person that has loved us and prayed for us.
This has not been an easy road thusfar and it isn't going to be any easier in the 4, 5, 6 months ahead. We both feel like we are barely keeping our heads above water. I don't say that lightly, nor do I say that to sound dramatic or communicate that we feel sorry for ourselves--we fully see the cross in front of us and embrace it with all our being. We are grateful for it--for in the carrying of this cross, we will find sanctification but that doesn't make it any lighter of a cross or easier to keep putting one foot in front of the other up a very long road.
There are many people who carry even heavier crosses that we couldn't even imagine carrying. We also know life won't always be like this; that some day we will look back and let out sighs of relief that these days are far behind us. But, in this interim period, we know we are weighed down. We feel worn and broken. We know that each day we have only enough energy and strength to get through just that one day. It feels as if we don't seem to have the strength to give back to those around us and be better friends and pour our love out to others. All we can do right now is say thank you and keep offering our suffering and Pia's suffering for each kind soul that keeps loving us and each soul that needs our prayers.
Not every moment is hard. We have moments of joy, of laughter. But, those moments aren't as plentiful as they used to be and that is just our reality right now. And, that is okay. It's okay that we don't smile every second and that we cry more and that we are struggling. This is our cross and it isn't going anywhere for a while.